Midwest-Dressed: Girl Look at That Body

Today we break from clothing to take a quick dive into an equally important facet of overall fashionliness, men’s health.

It might be a warm winter, but it can still be dry and windy, which saps your skin of an essential element: moisture. If you’re going to start dressing better, make sure your body starts looking better too (I have a body like chiseled marble, in texture and color, so if there’s any interest in a fitness piece from an unqualified professional, let me know). And so, some tips on winter grooming.

To be fair, it was a cold day & I had just gotten out of a pool.

Most guys pride themselves on how quickly they can shower. This is not something to be proud of. Like making love to a beautiful woman, a shower should last longer than five minutes. Anything less that that, and everyone ends up disappointed (not that I’d know). That being said, don’t stay too long in a hot shower. A hot shower in the middle of winter really dries out your skin, so stick to lukewarm as much as possible. Yes, it doesn’t feel as good, but it’s better for you. Kind of like a cardio workout or a colonoscopy.

Use a scrub brush or a loofah of some sort. Do you wash your car with your hands? No, so don’t be that way with your body. A loofah sloughs off old, dead skin and stimulates blood flow to your outer layers (this is not a cure for erectile dysfunction though).

These go for as low as 25 cents on Amazon

Also, invest in some good soap. Like I’ve said, cost usually equates with quality. That drugstore body wash you’ve been using smells like a high school locker room and dries your skin out as much as anything else. Try one of the soaps below. They clean well, smell great, and don’t suck your skin dry. They’ve also got small pieces of crap in them, like oatmeal or pepper corns, that help exfoliate and taste pretty decent if someone shoves the bar in your mouth because you said a naughty word.